To She or Not to She (looking for a Valentine?)

This image is © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used. 

To know me is to love me…is NOT what most people say if they know me.  Don’t get me wrong.  I know people who know me do, indeed, love me.  Keeping it real, though:  if they KNOW me, AND they love me – it’s a dangerous cocktail.

I am not your average, uhhhh, (rephrase) NORMAL person.

I am a Jesus freak, a control freak…a freak of nature.  I have extreme obsessive compulsive disorder about having order, am obsessed with my husband, and compulsive about just about anything.  I love wine, hate whining, and whine about whiners.  I am extremely organized in some ways, extremely messy in others, and just plain extreme.  I am eccentric, but old-fashioned.  I am a good cooker, bad with numbers, and mediocre in almost everything else.  I want my kids to be independent, as long as they depend on me.  I'm very serious, and I'm very silly.  And I'm very serious about being silly.  I have a collection of unconventional hats, which I wear to conventional places.  I sing with every song on the radio, and with every song in my heart.  I am obnoxious, but long-suffering.  I am patient, but not for long.  I want to serve, and I find it hard to receive being served.  I’m always tired, but hate to sleep.  I make presents way more than I buy presents, and I love being present.  I love being on-stage and putting it all out there, yet I’m one of the most private people I know.  My living legacy is important to me, and the legacy I leave behind is, too.  I’m a tad narcissistic, and a tad self-loathing.  I’m a tough nut to crack.  I’m a nut.

I’m not the easiest person to love – ESPECIALLY if you know me.

I am sure, though, if I know YOU, I love you.  In some way, and by some show – albeit nominal or intense - I absolutely love you.  It could be the bread I made you from scratch, the prayer I say for you, or the hug I make linger for a long (and sometimes awkward) time with you……or just by telling you so.  But you can bet - I love you.

So, if you're looking for a Valentine:  To She or not to She.  THAT is the question.  Good luck to you, WHICHEVER you choose.

Merci Beucoup

Photo Source: By Dennis Jarvis from Halifax, Canada (France-000159 - Carousel & Tower) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

I really thought when I hosted French Feast Night, I would be done.  I really believed that this was the night of all nights and there would BE no topping it and no more theme nights.  It was INSANE……and I was almost right.

To start the night, we donned the night with the name: “French Feast at Chateau de Garcia” and dressed in our French garb.  (Yes.  We just happen to have French garb lying around our house!)

These images are © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used. 

Next, the gathering of guests.  We had the Dirkses (lovingly referred to by me as “The Dirksys”, pronounced Durk-seez) the Penates, the Burkes, the Adamitises, and the Timmonses.

Waiting when they arrived were some fun cut outs to take photos.  Now THIS was the start of the perfect theme night to end all theme nights:

These images are © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used. 

Of course we started the night off with a cocktail – it was called the French 75 – and amuse bouche.  This was simply different French cheeses, crackers, and marinated olives.  But YUM.  Next course was the aperitifs, or the appetizers.  Now THIS portion of the menu was off-da-chain!  It consisted of croquet monsieur, which I can only describe to you as the ultimate ham and cheese sandwich with Dijon béchamel and broiled Gruyere on top.  I also made escargot vol au vent (pastry shells stuffed with garlic butter, green onion, nutmeg and helix snails), and foie gras French toast (pan-seared duck liver in a balsamic glaze over crispy filo).  Oh yes.  I was well on my way to never having a theme night again…there was going to be NO TOPPING THIS.

Next course – French onion soup flambé.  Now I've tried this before with other themes and the soup never catches the flame.  Well, not on the last theme night ever!  Of COURSE it went perfectly.  The brandy caught on fire and made the most beautiful flame, cooking the cheeses on top to perfection!  Next was the salad Nicoise.  Superb, of course!

On perfect theme night, I knew nothing less than two entrees would do, so I made Boeuf Bourguignon and Coq au Vin. (Braised beef stewed in burgundy and chicken thighs made with white wine and chocolate - recipe to follow).  This was accompanied by 'burnt' pasta Provencal (that’s only the name – NOTHING was burnt on pure perfection night!), and ratatouille.  I must say that there is no way of getting through to you how delicious everything was.  It was the most amazing night!  And I was a little sad……because there would never be a night to top it.

So.  Dessert.  What does one make on French Feast Night?  Why, crème brulet, of COURSE!!  After a meal like this, accompanied by the different French wines and homemade French bread, we needed the finishing touch that would send everyone home feeling that they were a part of history!  The cream that had been whipped by hand…the beautiful organic berries I had hand-picked to place around the dessert like a crown!

I had made crème brulet before…and it was GOOD.  So knowing I had this many people and not enough small ramekins, I decided to go one step ABOVE – I made it on a grand scale in a casserole dish!  Oh, wouldn't they be impressed??  Out it comes.  I scorch the top with my hand-held torch.  It was BEAUTIFUL.  Smiling proudly as I watched them all take a bite, I found myself daydreaming about how awesome I was and how I had created the best theme night there ever was.  Hmmm…what is that look on their faces?  That’s not how I envisioned it…”How is it?” I ask.  (I tried to sound as humble as possible).  “It’s a little eggy”, says one.  “This is the WORST thing I have ever put in my mouth!”, says another.  What??  This couldn't be!!  But it was.  I had made the pudding on a grand scale…and overcooked it.  It was like a sweet (and gross) egg casserole; not crème brulet.  I was devastated.  All the hard work I had put into that evening was lost in my mind.  I couldn't believe it.

But of course, our friends and family lovingly reminded me that everything else had, indeed, been impeccable.  And when I told them I thought this would be the theme night to end all theme nights, they knew (used this to make me feel better) that I had subconsciously sabotaged my own dessert so that more theme nights would come, and this really WOULDN'T be the last.

We, as human beings, tend to put all the good things on a shelf and cling to the bad.  We lose sight of all the hard work, and subconsciously sabotage ourselves out of what could be something lovely.  We create our memories from the worst moments, forgetting the best ones, and never savoring them.  And all the while, we never stop to think that this moment could very well be our last.

~Fin

These images are © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used. 

EASY COQ au VIN

Ingredients:

5 pieces pancetta or bacon, cut into pieces

8 chicken thighs

1 large onion, chopped

2 stalks celery, chopped

4 cloves garlic, minced

1 tablespoon brandy or bourbon

2 cups white wine

2 cups chicken stock

1 bay leaf

6 sprigs thyme

3 tablespoons tomato paste

2 tablespoons flour

8 ounces button mushrooms trimmed and halved

8 ounces pearl onions, trimmed and peeled

Parsley, chopped for garnish

4 oz. dark chocolate (about half a bar – I use organic, of course)

Instructions:

In a pan or Dutch oven (I use my cast iron Dutch oven), fry the bacon over medium heat until most of the fat has rendered out (but not until its crisp). Transfer the bacon to a bowl.

Salt and pepper the chicken thighs and place in the hot pan. Leave undisturbed for 6-7 minutes or until golden brown, then flip the chicken over, allowing it to brown lightly on the second side. Transfer the chicken to the bowl with the bacon.

The pan should now have brown residue on the bottom. This is what gives the dish much of its depth. Remove 2 tablespoons of fat from the pan and set it aside in a small bowl. Add the onion, celery and garlic and sauté until soft, scraping the residue off the bottom of the pan with a wooden spoon.

Hit the pan with a generous splash of brandy or bourbon to deglaze the pan. Allow most of the liquid to evaporate, and then add the white wine, chicken stock, bay leaf, thyme, and tomato paste. Return the bacon and chicken to the pan and turn several times to make sure each piece is well coated and submerged in the liquid. Cover with the lid slightly askew (so steam can escape) and simmer over medium low heat until the chicken is tender 35-45 minutes.

Add the flour to the fat you've reserved and stir until there are no lumps. When the chicken is tender, transfer to a plate and tent with foil. Add the mushrooms and onions to the pan and turn up the heat to medium, simmering uncovered for about 15 minutes or until the onions are cooked and the sauce has reduced a bit. Add a few tablespoons of sauce to the fat/flour mixture and stir to make ‘creamy’. Add the mixture to the sauce in the pan one spoonful at a time, mixing well after each addition to make sure there are no lumps.  Add chocolate to the pot and stir until melted.  Salt and pepper, cumin and garlic powder to taste.  Sprinkle with parsley.

A Pie To The Face

Photo Source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/72006245@N05/6506044479

Back in the days of Vaudeville, and when variety acts and shows were a really big deal, slapstick comedy was a must.  You know, the days when they would use a cane to get you off the stage if they thought you stunk, because it would save you from being pelted with rotten tomatoes.  Back then (and now, really) a pie to the face was FUNNY.  There is actually a name for it: pieing.

For some reason, it was always a coconut cream pie.  This was not considered a waste of a perfectly good coconut cream pie, either, because it was something that brought a smile to your face.  All the great comedians did it: Soupy Sales was the master of it, Carol Burnett, Lucille Ball, The Three Stooges…heck, Charlie Chaplin even made the first movie that ever had pieing in it, Behind the Screen, in 1916.  Can you believe that??  1916!!

So I think it’s a fair statement that pieing has been around for a while.  I would even venture to say it is part of comedic history.  Why?  Because a coconut cream pie to the face can bring a smile.

Well, I pied my friend.  And I’m proud of it.  Yes, I put a coconut cream pie in her face……and it made her smile.  I baked my special coconut cream pie and delivered it to my friend Kacey and within an hour, I received a phone call.  “This is the best thing I've ever put in my mouth!!  No, all kidding aside, it makes up for everything bad that has ever happened in my life!”  I have to tell you that brought tears of joy to my eyes, because I had baked it with 100% love in the recipe.  (Remember Flat Biscuits?)  It truly was one of the nicest compliments I've ever received – so I guess I’m part of comedic history!

So, Ladies and Gentlemen, without further ado, I am avoiding being caned off-stage for not sharing the recipe for this pie.  But a word of caution:  love is not listed as one of the ingredients in the recipe - that should just be a given.  There is a secret ingredient that will make the entire pie amazing…but without creating this masterpiece with love, it just won’t taste the same.

Sometimes we may feel as though we’re on the receiving end of pieing.  It can make us feel like rotten tomatoes are being pelted at us.  But remember that some of the greats got pied and made history!  And also remember that being on the receiving end of a pie-to-the-face isn't ALWAYS a bad thing. :-)

This image is © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used. 

Coconut Cream Pie-to-the-Face Pie

Ingredients (I use all-organic, but it’s not necessary)

5 cups sweetened flaked coconut

7 tablespoons butter

About 1/2 cup chocolate chips (the secret ingredient!) – I don’t measure, I just cover the entire crust with the chips

2 large eggs

1/2 cup sugar

1/4 cup all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 cups whole milk

3/4 cup heavy cream

Additional sweetened flaked coconut, toasted – NECESSARY!

Preparation

1. Preheat oven to 350ºF. Mist a 9-inch pie plate with cooking spray. Place 3 cups coconut in a bowl. In a pan, melt 5 tablespoons of the butter. Stir butter into coconut until it’s all moistened. Press into the bottom and sides of the pie plate. Bake until crust is deep golden brown, which is usually about 25-to-30 minutes. Check on it often—if edges are browning before the bottom does, cover the edges with foil. Take the crust out of the oven. Sprinkle chocolate chips over hot crust and let stand for 5 minutes, until melted. Gently spread chocolate over bottom of crust. Refrigerate crust for 10-to-15 minutes.

2. In a bowl, whisk eggs, sugar, flour and vanilla until smooth. Warm milk in a pan over medium heat until nearly simmering, BUT DON’T LET IT BOIL. Whisking constantly, slowly pour hot milk into egg mixture (this is called tempering so you don’t end up with scrambled eggs in your pie). Return milk mixture to pan. Cook over low heat, stirring constantly, until mixture begins to boil and thickens enough to coat back of a spoon, which usually takes about 5 minutes. Remove from heat, stir in the remaining 2 cups coconut and last 2 tablespoons butter; let stand 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. Pour custard into crust. Cover with plastic wrap, pressing directly against surface of custard, and chill completely, and hour-and-a-half.

3. Using an electric mixer, beat cream until stiff peaks form. Spread whipped cream over custard, swirling decoratively. Chill pie for 30 minutes. Sprinkle with toasted coconut. 

4.  Put it in yer face.  SMILE.

Photo Source: facebook.com/kaceyboagni

Phyllis & Ellie

Copyright 1976 American Broadcasting Company (ABC)

It doesn't matter who you are or where you've been.  A friendship that stands the test of time means there was a solid foundation that it rested upon.  I believe there is a season for people that come and go in your life…that they were meant to be there during a time that you needed them, whether you think so or not.  Maybe it was to teach you something, or maybe it was just because you needed that caliber of love and encouragement you were given.  But then there are those that no matter what happens or where you are in your life, you know they will always be there – be a part of your life…a special part of your heart.

 There once was a woman with a calling.  She had a love affair with what she believed was right in her faith and followed it.  She gave up the world as we know it to serve and felt that at that time is was very right.  As she progressed in this calling, she met someone who felt the same calling to the same faith to the same place in her soul she felt was right.  And they became friends.  They became the kind of friends I just talked about – the loyalty and love ran thicker and tighter than any circumstance they could have ever faced.

 The rules of the faith they followed changed their names, though their spirits remained the same.  Their kinship continued to grow as they did.  They each faced trials and tribulations that brought them to places in their life most of us understand, but hope we never have to go through.  And with each moment of perseverance they had to face, they were molded and changed into different people – and their friendship remained. 

 At different times, they were roommates, friends, sisters(both in their faith and to each other), women of faith, strength in numbers, healthy and viral, and sensitive to each other’s needs – and not just under the cloak of a habit…it was more than that; meaningful and intentional.  And then, at other times, they were alone, distant, found themselves following different spiritual paths, strength in their individuality, and – sickness found each of them, though each with a different name.

 As their families grew, names were given to them based on the originality of who they were.  One’s nephew called her by her birth-given name, Phyllis.  The same nephew became the other’s godson, and as a child was unable to pronounce the name everyone knew, so in his child-like way, he called her “Ellie” – as close as he could get.

 Phyllis and Ellie went in different directions as life took them to the places they landed and became comfortable…but their friendship never wavered.  From the time they were 14-year-old-girls until well into their prime, they remained strong on the foundation they had built.  As life happens, one had to deal with Alzheimer’s and the other, Cancer.  Sometimes the things life brings you can tear down even the oldest of friendships – but only if your foundation isn't solid and tangible.  Phyllis and Ellie stood strong.  Often they would be there for one another if they could, but for Phyllis, Alzheimer’s took over her mind,  and then her body so she did the very best she could.  Ultimately, the disease took her life.  Ellie fought Cancer and still fights as I type this story, but has not let it get the very best of her.

 Ellie went to be with Phyllis during her last few hours here on earth, and though Phyllis struggled for so long with not remembering, she knew Ellie was there and the last things Ellie said to her.  And with the peace that Ellie feels for Phyllis’ passing and not suffering any more, her heart aches the loss of her friend.  She knows she will see her again someday.  She knows the foundation is still the solidity of their life together…and that it helped create the widely-loved, strong woman she is today and will continue to be until she sees Phyllis again.

 At Phyllis’ funeral, Ellie said to her godson – Phyllis’ nephew- “I guess there is no more Phyllis and Ellie.”  To which her godson replied, “There will ALWAYS be a Phyllis and Ellie.” 

And he’s right.

 Who is the Phyllis or the Ellie in your life?  As you build your legacy and this short life passes you by, be still and decipher who that person is in your life.  Who do you have the solid foundation with that God has built Himself into?  Remember the people that have passed through and made a difference – good or bad, it’s shaped you and given you wisdom.  But always be there for the one that has helped give you solidity.  Don’t just let a habit take over……be meaningful and intentional and allow it to mold you and create the person you ultimately become.  Enjoy every moment to its absolute fullest because one day our last day will be here.  And that foundation and what it has become will be the legacy you leave……just like Phyllis and Ellie.

Prom Night, and So We Did

This image is © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used.

In past blog posts, I've described the wide range of friends we are blessed enough to have.  We don't discriminate when it comes to friendships......it is quite an eclectic variety; however, we are very particular about WHAT we do, and with WHOM.  

For example, there is a couple in particular - we'll call them Mark and Jenny Meirtschin......mostly because that's their name.  They are pretty accepting when it comes to the Garcia Crazy Antics.  Thank goodness.

When I had my 40th birthday party (a story for a future blog post!), it was a 70s theme.  Some of the costumes were amazing, but Mark and Jenny ROCKED it.  They didn't do the regular afro or go-go boots...they came as Prom King & Queen 1970!  The blue-ruffled tuxedo and the polyester dress were fabulous, and at the end of the night, they presented Adrian and I with the sashes they had they made for their costumes.  But that show of kindness would come back to haunt them.  

This image is © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used.

A few months back, we all decided we were long-overdue to get together. Adrian and I really wanted to bless Mark and Jenny and somehow let them know how much it meant to us, as we had taken those sashes and hung them in our closet where we could see them every day to remind us of that special time.  What does one do with leftover fake prom king and queen sashes??  Well, they take the people who gave them such gifts to prom, of course!

And so we did.

We sent an invitation, letting them know the dress-code, but didn't tell them why.  We really wanted this to be as authentic as possible, so we decked out Adrian's truck like a limo inside.  Adrian put up white Christmas lights, there was an ice bucket containing various drinks, and we hung a dark curtain between the front seat and the back seat.  It looked pretty legit.

This image is © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used.

Adrian and I dressed for prom - mostly from our own prom era, which is scary - put on the sashes accompanied by the fake-but-beautiful corsage Jenny had also given me from that night, and then headed out to pick them up.  When we showed up at the door in our garb and sashes, welcoming them to Prom Night, I thought Jenny was going to drop.  We stood at her front door, laughing so hard and so long until tears were streaming down our faces before a word had even been spoken.  They weren't surprised though......she even said, "I somehow knew those sashes would surface again one day!!"  We had Dollar Store crowns and a fake-and-tacky corsage and boutonniere we had made for each of them, which they willingly put on, and well, it's not a prom unless you stand by the fireplace with your dates and pose in awkward and ridiculous poses...and so we did.

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Next, Adrian ran outside, put on his limo-cap and held up the Meirtschin / Garcia Prom sign (he played the dual-role of the limo driver, too) and opened the doors for them to enter.  

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As we pulled up to our next prom destination - a cliché steak house, of course - they began to remove their crowns.  Oh, no they di'in't!  "It's prom night.  Those crowns stay on."  They looked at each other, remembered who they were dealing with, and obliged without (much) protest.

This image is © 2015 by Life As She Does It. Please link back or credit if any content or images are used. 

In we walked, heads held high, 30-and-40-something-year-olds dressed for prom...and OWNING IT.  We delighted in prom food fare, splitting every dish, laughing and loving it until we were just about sick.  Next destination?  Dancing, of course!  And so we did.  

Luckily, we had done our homework ahead of time and we found a place within walking distance.  And we danced our prom night away.  (Side note on that:  Mark has got some of the best and smoothest dancing moves you've ever seen in your LIFE!).  We drove home, feet hurting, hearts warm and full, with a life-long lasting memory of a wonderful Prom Night.

And so we did.

Make the most of every single moment you're given, and take advantage of every opportunity.  NEVER think you're too cool or be so embarrassed that you miss out on the things that might be considered unusual......and never let a prom night pass you by - so that you, too, can have life-long lasting memories that will make your hearts feel warm and full.