To know me is to love me…is NOT what most people say if they know me. Don’t get me wrong. I know people who know me do, indeed, love me. Keeping it real, though: if they KNOW me, AND they love me – it’s a dangerous cocktail.
I am not your average, uhhhh, (rephrase) NORMAL person.
I am a Jesus freak, a control freak…a freak of nature. I have extreme obsessive compulsive disorder about having order, am obsessed with my husband, and compulsive about just about anything. I love wine, hate whining, and whine about whiners. I am extremely organized in some ways, extremely messy in others, and just plain extreme. I am eccentric, but old-fashioned. I am a good cooker, bad with numbers, and mediocre in almost everything else. I want my kids to be independent, as long as they depend on me. I'm very serious, and I'm very silly. And I'm very serious about being silly. I have a collection of unconventional hats, which I wear to conventional places. I sing with every song on the radio, and with every song in my heart. I am obnoxious, but long-suffering. I am patient, but not for long. I want to serve, and I find it hard to receive being served. I’m always tired, but hate to sleep. I make presents way more than I buy presents, and I love being present. I love being on-stage and putting it all out there, yet I’m one of the most private people I know. My living legacy is important to me, and the legacy I leave behind is, too. I’m a tad narcissistic, and a tad self-loathing. I’m a tough nut to crack. I’m a nut.
I’m not the easiest person to love – ESPECIALLY if you know me.
I am sure, though, if I know YOU, I love you. In some way, and by some show – albeit nominal or intense - I absolutely love you. It could be the bread I made you from scratch, the prayer I say for you, or the hug I make linger for a long (and sometimes awkward) time with you……or just by telling you so. But you can bet - I love you.
So, if you're looking for a Valentine: To She or not to She. THAT is the question. Good luck to you, WHICHEVER you choose.